Monday, June 30, 2014

A REAL(?) warlord of Mars?

Every once and again, I encounter a UFO-related story that has a certain effect on me.

I have described that rident effect before as being similar to a response given by Flounder on Animal House:

"Oh boy, is this GREAT!"

By this I mean a story so sensational that it has very little to it in the way of evidence but emits such a pulpy bouquet that I find it undeniably fun.  The narrative of "Captain Kaye" is exemplary of this sort.

Captain Kaye is a retired Marine who claims to have been stationed on Mars for 17 years.  How can that be?  Well it was all part of this secret space program, see.  Apparently we're all over the place up there.  Not just us, but the Russians and the Chinese as well.  In fact, Kaye claims to have been trained on a a secret base on the Moon called Lunar Operations.  The ex-Marine maintains that while training there he learned to pilot three different fighters and bombers built for space.  Good thing too.  For as we're given to understand it, our reach extends beyond the Moon and Mars with chapters established on Saturn's moon Titan and even deeper into space.

But it was Mars where Kaye saw the most action.  What kind of action?  Specifically, defending a colony of humans from the indigenous population of Mars.

"Oh boy is this GREAT!"

"Wait, Jon," you may say.  "The current thought in exobiology is that while Mars might have had water and supported life at one time, it couldn't be much more than microbial lifeforms by this point."

I guess we've been woefully misinformed according to Captain Kaye.  After all, he did 17 years on the planet and the US Mars colony apparently goes back decades before his start date.  In that time we've discovered that not only is there life on Mars but it's considerably more advanced than microbes.

Naturally I've been looking for anything to bear any of this out.  The link above has a video from UFO-TV (and if you can't trust them then just who can you trust?) that I watched.  It told me...nothing.  Hell, you could find out as much fact and fiction about Mars from a Google search.

So then I found this link at UFO Mania.  It too has a video.  This one is from Michael Salla of exopolitics fame and he actually interviews Kaye...or a guy alleging himself to be Kaye.  And it has audio of very dubious quality.  What can be learned about Kaye from the interview?  Well, he doesn't know that "irregardless" is not a word.  Aside from that, the man describes the various installations he has visited on the Moon and Mars as well as the forms of conveyance that brought him to "Forward Station Zebra" of the "Mars Defense Force."

His briefing described the indigenous lifeforms as savage insectoids and reptoids.  Kaye found out later that this was not the case and the Martians are a "very evolved species with quite a bit of technology, quite a bit of civilization."  The rest of it sounds like something from various Hollywood films, including his time in captivity among reptoids.

While there isn't a shred of evidence for this tale, I would like it to be true for one reason only.  Kaye claims that his retirement ceremony on the Moon was attended by various "VIPs" and among them was Donald Rumsfeld.

Rummy on the Moon?  Did he bounce around in zero g while reciting poetry?

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