Wednesday, January 28, 2015

The coffee fountain

What I have for you today may seem weird.

I know, I know, you're shocked. But I think it's especially odd this time around as it's nothing more than a tangential thought, an oddity that wandered through my mind today. Here we go.

I am a devout coffee drinker. More of an addict, really. There is a demarcation point of quantity that I must not cross given my sour stomach, but I still need it. Given the innumerable memes on Facebook and elsewhere for caffeine addiction and the fact that coffee has long been one of the most valuable commodities in cabotage, I know that I'm not alone.

So it hit me today. Workplaces have water fountains. Why can't they have coffee fountains?

Yeah yeah, I know. Most have coffee makers in their break rooms or even kitchens so why do we need a fountain?

Because it would be cool. That's why.

Imagine yourself just walking down the hallway to a meeting my case,,,class and stopping for a quick hit of java. Just press the button and there it is. Fill your mug or sip it straight into your mouth. The water would have to be merely warm and not piping hot so as to avoid scalding. That might be a drawback but its the price you pay for a quick guzzle.

Of course someone would also have to change out the coffee filters in the fountains. It's tough enough to get someone to brew a new pot in the break room. Can't imagine what it would be like to mandate a collaborative rotation on that task. Could the janitorial handle it when they clean the coffee fountain along with the water fountains? I'd hate to put another chore on their list, though.

I'm just be waiting for Buzzfeed's "Top 5 Office Coffee Fountain Problems That We Can't Even..."

This concept must not be confined solely to my weird mind. When I did a Google out of curiosity, I came across the image above. I also found this tidbit.

That's right. Why bother with the coffee pot or even the coffee fountain when you can just absorb it through your skin? It's also supposed to give your epidermis a healthy glow.

Best of all possible worlds, right?

Follow me on Twitter: @Jntweets


  1. On FB, Bernard said: "I like mine white with sugar. How are we going to fix that?"

    We would have to install a sugar conduit. Probably one for cream as well. Now it's getting problematic.

  2. On FB, FrankR said: "I've been in my share of workplaces; I still believe piping in coffee to workstations is more efficient and makes for a better workforce.
    With me, it's not my stomach that limits my coffee intake; it's the other mechanics (plumbing?) of nature."


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