Checking into the Hotel Dulce

Beware. Random thoughts ahead...

I am headed to Dulce. If you have a kind heart and want to "help a brother out," I've got a Fundrazr for it.

You know about the project, right? I've written about it before. The tiny town in New Mexico that supposedly has a highly sophisticated base hidden deep inside a nearby mesa? Allegedly, this base houses both humans and aliens as they conduct nefarious experiments, augmenting and twisting human bodies in all manner of grotesque and unnatural ways. What's more, fighting is said to have once broken out between the aliens and the clandestine, shadowy members of our government at the base. This resulted in a firefight as we sent special ops in to retake the base in what the UFO conspiracy sects of the internet often refer to as the "Dulce Wars." It is this supposed conflict that I wish to build my book of literary nonfiction upon.

Did it really happen? I don't know. That's why I'm going there in July as well as immersing myself in numerous tomes on the subject that land both on the sensational and highly skeptical ends of the spectrum. What is known for certain is that the region around Dulce did at one point have an extraordinary amount of cattle mutilations and UFO sightings. Although in terms of the latter, the National UFO Reporting Center lists their last report from Dulce as being all the way back in 2009. Nevertheless, I am obligated to due diligence if I am to write a book on the subject and must therefore visit the town. But it might not be UFO activity that holds the real promise for me. Maybe that's inside the "base."

So let's just say for the sake of argument that I somehow (and it's a big "somehow") manage to get inside the Dulce Base. Naturally that presupposes that it even exists to begin with but play along with this hypothetical for a moment, do you mind? Anyway, maybe I can weasel my way into the lab. Or one of them at any rate. There are apparently many labs in this facility that is said to reach seven or eight levels deep into the ground. I'm wondering if I could create a virtual simulation of the installation, maybe in Second Life where people could take a tour of the place as they read. You know, "exit through the virtual gift shop where you can buy a copy of Nichols' latest book." But I digress...

Once in a lab, perhaps I can come up with a way to cajole, bamboozle, or otherwise smooth talk one of the humans or aliens (I don't really care which) into finally making me fully transhuman. I go there as Professor Jon Nichols. I return as...JonDroid!

Can you see it? Me, dealing with the UFO occupants?

"Yeah, a cyborg. No, none of those crazy things I've heard of you doing like grafting ears to my back or crossbreeding me with a kangaroo. I'm talking total body prosthesis. Upload my consciousness into a body of chrome, steel, and carbon fiber. What do you get? I dunno. Want my shoe? Or wait, you can have my meat body since I won't need it anymore. Hey, what are you doing with that butt probe?"

So I'll admit...it might not work out. I'll have Bernard with me. Maybe he'll have better ideas when it comes to bartering.

Then again, the whole thing might be disappointing on a number of levels. Gregs Bishop and Valdez have each written books on Dulce that offer explanations both middling and prosaic. I hate to say it but they seem by far the most likely ones as opposed to the "Dulce Wars" accounts that appear lifted straight from pulp novels. And not good ones at that. But wait! There's still hope! Another possibility is a variation on the die-hard skeptic's retort of "it's all in your head."

What if the occurrences at Dulce are happening at the subconscious level? Researchers and experiencers of the abduction phenomenon, such as John Mack and Whitley Strieber, have often posited that we may be dealing with extradimensional beings and not aliens...or at least not aliens in the popular Hollywood sense. These may be incorporeal entities that assume the described forms and conceits in order to relate to us. Why? That's a bigger question. Perhaps I will not encounter physical remnants of a firefight between aliens and the military, but rather an ethereal, almost hallucinatory experience. That would be a compelling story in and of itself.

But it still wouldn't get me a cybernetic body.

"We are part of a symbiotic relationship with something which disguises itself as an extraterrestrial invasion so as not to alarm us." --Terence McKenna


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