You're never so clean as when you're scrubbing with bacteria

Did you engage in a little "your peanut butter in their chocolate/their chocolate in your peanut butter" activity this past Valentine's day with a less-than-healthy partner?  Time to scrub up.

To that end, I'm recommending these soaps that I found on Geeks Are Sexy.  Fashioned to look like bacteria cultures, they even come in their own Petrie dishes.  So realistic in appearance, only your microbiologist will know for sure.  Actually, the scents of Green Apple and Grapefruit will probably be a tip off for most people, but you'll have them going visually for at least a little while.  Bacterial varieties include Staphylococcus, Salmonella, Pseudomonas aeruginosa, and our old favorite pictured above, E. coli.  But let's say you're into those smaller, more decorative soaps.  You know, the kind that are fashioned, colored, and scented like real fruit and you don't know the difference until you have it in with your corn flakes and the milk goes on?  In that case, you'll really dig their collection of miniature red blood cells, likewise featured on the Geeks Are Sexy page.

Nifty as all this is, it's actually reminiscent of a few things from years back.  I can remember when Joe Boxer released a line of men's underwear that featured wild patterns and bright colors.  Turns out the designs were various sexually transmitted diseases as seen under extreme magnification.  In case you're wondering, the motivation for such a clothing line was to send the proceeds to various organizations that treat and prevent STDs.  Plus, it could be sold with the catchy tagline of "give your guy the clap!"

There's also a line of plush toys called GIANTmicrobes.  They're exactly the kind of slanted, snarky jab at a Disneyfied society that this jaded semi-iconoclast finds heartwarming.  I mean, what little kid wouldn't want to go to bed while cuddling a soft replica of a dust mite or typhoid fever?  Or my favorite, the Martian microbe (pictured below.)  Come to think of it, there might have been a line of stuffed dolls called Parasite Pals, showcasing ticks, fleas, and tapeworms.

Gotta catch 'em all.

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