Saturday, September 4, 2010

Guest Blogger Kip Haggis on the Digital Age

Hola amigos!  Been long while since I rapped at ya.
My White Sox are pretty much out of the pennant race.  But that's ok.  Football season is here and my Packers are looking mighty fine!  Two words I'm thinkin': "NEW DYNASTY."
Me?  I've been consulting during the week and working hard on my smoked bbq on weekends.  Tried to get a bunch of people together this weekend for a bbq and play a few Eric Clapton songs I just learned on the acoustic guitar.  You know, sit out under the sun and the trees, spend time with family and friends.

But when I try to call people, they DON'T call me back. They tell me "you gotta email me, catch me on Facebook, on Twitter, or text me."  Well you know what?  FORGET THAT!  I'm tired of the digitization of our society.  It's keeping people apart, man.  And we're supposed to get together!  Because to get together is to get together.  God WANTS us to get together.  He wants us to talk in the old fashioned way: face to face. Remember that? That's why He put our eyes and mouths on our fronts, just like the way He made bananas curve up so we can eat them easier.  It's what God wants.  And if you want to go against God, it's YOUR afterlife that's gonna suck, not MINE.
But aw no.  People nowadays are too into talking through a mouse.  They got their XCubes and their Facebook, and their Twitter.  "Twitter."  Feh.  Sounds like what ya used to do with a girl in the backseat of the car.
Ya know, it's like what Ferris Beuller says: "Life moves pretty fast.  If you don't slow down, you might just miss it."
Remember when AT&T's ad slogan used to be "Reach out and touch someone?"  You know what it is now?  "Your world, delivered."  It's not like I'm ordering a PIZZA.
Our world is being ruined by technology...no matter what Nichols says about "transhumanism" (whatever the hell that is) or "the singularity" (ditto) on his blog.  "Blog."  Yech.  Sounds like something I left in the toilet.
We're getting gummed up without contact with each other, man.  It's like in Winnie the Pooh, where he gets stuck in Rabbit's window?  Yeah.  Just like that.  And the only way we'll make it better is by just walking away from the computers for a while and live!  PLAY!  Smell the ROSES!  It's like in WALL-E, where the robot says "I don't want to survive, I want to live!"  One day this whole fad of globally networked computers is going to go AWAY.  Be deader than Pokemon and the hula hoop and then where will you be?  No friends around you, man...that's for SURE!     
So get a life!  Twittering idiots...

Til next time, amigos.  Peace, love, and smoked bbq,
Kip

Follow me on Twitter: @Jntweets

1 comment:

  1. On Facebook, Ghost Dogg said: "Yikes!"

    I know. That Kip is a helluva jackass. -JN

    ReplyDelete